Friday, September 30, 2016

A Family Update

It's been awhile.  Our kids have grown up a lot these past couple of years, and lots of changes have taken place.  There have been lots of ups and downs.  Though we love all of our children very much, we know that as they enter adulthood, they are free to make their own choices.  Some of their choices have made us smile, while others continue to put us through trial.

Many of our adult children are not living at home anymore.  Adam, Rachel, Caleb, Julia, Anna, and Galina are off pursuing their own lives.  We keep in touch with all them, some more than others.  A few are in college, one is off doing missions, a few are off "being adults", and one is married and expecting their first child.  

As far as going into more detail... well I won't.  At the same time, I do not want to appear disingenuous by ignoring the questions and evading the obvious that they are hardly mentioned on this blog anymore.  Simply, we want to focus on happenings going on in our home and those that we are invited to be a part of.  

Those are the things I will continue to share on this blog.  Nothing more, nothing less.

Infer what you wish.  Or don't.  It's up to you.  Those closest to us know what our family and home represent... who we are.  

21 comments:

  1. You have been a faithful blogger Christine for years and given a generous glimpse of family life into a large family with children born to you and children chosen by you. :)
    You don't owe anybody an explanation.

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  2. She speaks for me! (Quaker speak for I agree with Christie) I can't believe you have that many adults and one married - soon to be two! Time flies. You are blessed. But that doesn't mean you don't feel pain. All my best to you Christine!

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  3. I found your blog when you were bringing Dennis home and have followed it faithfully. Best of luck to you and your family and I look forward to reading about the big move.

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  4. I totally agree - you don't owe anyone an explanation.

    Every family goes through a huge adjustment when kids become adults, regardless of their choices, it's still a big adjustment. You are going through that X6! That's emotionally battering no matter what your kids are doing. I imagine it's been a roller coaster of emotions for you and the whole family.

    Then you add in moving to a new state with a new culture - you need time to adjust to your new normals!

    There's a lot of grieving going on, even over positive changes. Because things will never be the same again, it really is something to grieve.

    So don't make apologies and take care of yourself.

    Thanks for when you do write, I always enjoy it.

    Ruth (also from East Texas!)

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  5. Growing up children is hard, very hard. They break your heart, and bless you both at the same time. You have all my love and lots of prayers.

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  6. With adult kids it gets trickier knowing what to share and what not to. I think it's best to err on the side of caution, most of all not wanting to share more about someone else's life than they want you to. You don't owe your readers information as much as you owe your adult children discretion. :-) Good choice, Mom.

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  7. It is a lot harder when your kids get older and you feel that you don't really have a "right" to share certain things about them any longer. I have an extremely private blog - even the invited people can't quite figure out how to get there I gather. But, when I wrote something really rather lovely about my grown daughter, the one troll who managed to betray my trust to get access to my blog, posted garbage about her online. My daughter was so hurt to have private information treated in that way.

    It is hard because I NEED and cherish you and other friends from afar who not only share my values but also some of my story....unlike many of the people I am friends with IRL.

    I'd love to know how your children are doing, but I can understand why you don't let us know.

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  8. I would expect nothing less or more of you! When kids grow up they begin their own lives and it's appropriate that you would not share their personal lives here.

    I'm still here, still following, even though I myself don't keep up with my own old blog.

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  9. It does change when they become adults. Not all of mine are making choices I'm totally in agreement with, but we've planted the seeds. There is only one I am not in contact with at all and that is because of a misunderstanding and he chose to block all of us rather than clarify what was going on!

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  10. You don't owe anyone an apology.

    You've clearly done a fantastic job to have children who are able to move onto adulthood so confidently. So many kids seem to live at home til they're in their 30s these days! To be sharing what goes on in their homes and lives would definitely have to come with their permission at their ages and stages.

    I'm excited for you that you have a grandchild on the way though! That child will have so many loving aunts and uncles. What joy.

    Thank you for sharing your life with us all - both the smiles and the trials. :-)

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  11. I think it's totally awesome how you handle the blog. You don't have to explain to anyone. Those people who criticized you for writing too much about your teens now are critical of not writing of them. You will never be able to please people like that, so don't even consider them. Now the fact that you and all your kids keep in touch is great! We are all different, we have different ways of remaining part of our childhood families as we grow up. I, for example, avoid any contact with my former adoptive mother and her present husband, but I keep in touch with the siblings I grew up with--most of whom don't keep in touch with their mother either. I don't know if that will ever change.

    As our second wave of teenagers grow into young adults, I often go back and read some of your posts. I'm glad that there are people who have done this before me, and who were willing to share some of their experiences.

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  12. Hi Christine, I love reading your blog and about your family. You don't owe any explanations about not sharing certain aspects of your life here. It is tough when our children become adults and even tougher when they make choices that we don't always approve of.

    I hope you are all settling in well into that beautiful new home. I bet the kids love it!! I know my kids would love the pool and the 2 acres:-)

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  13. Thank you for the update on your family. Private family intricacies are just that.....private. I follow one of your children's blogs. She is doing an amazing job on the missions field. Can't wait to follow your family as you transition into your new home and life in Texas. Smiles and Trials is certainly a fitting name for all families, large or small.

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  14. I admire you bc of how well you handle life and various parenting curve balls. Keep up the awesome work. Love the blog.

    Allie

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  15. I totally get what you mean. I often say, "That is not my story to tell." It's hard to accurately represent my life on the blog while respecting my kids' privacy. We have 7 no longer at home, although our Army son will probably move back in when he gets out, but one of the girls is getting married...right now there are 9 at home. When kids grow up and make their own choices, and we choose not to broadcast those things, if anyone doesn't like that, too bad so sad. You are an amazing mama, and I have followed your blog for years and years. Just keep your connection with God in all that you do, and you will continue to be blessed.:)

    Della

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  16. Hi Christine......you owe no explanations at all. I have followed you for several years.........before Dennis........and have enjoyed reading all your smiles and trials. I love reading your blog and will continue to do so with what you are willing to share. I love your new house!! It is beautiful! You will have many happy years there. Sometimes a change is just great. I moved across Canada twice with my husbands job, and it was always a new adventure. Enjoy!!

    Marilyn from Canada

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  17. Hello Christine-

    I have followed your blog for many years. We adopted our daughter from Ivanovo about 13 years ago. I started reading your blog because I believe two of your daughters were from Ivanovo and one of them may have been from the same orphanage. Your posts were very helpful to us.

    Our daughter is 25 now and living independently. We have had our fair share of smiles and trials but she is happy with the life she has chosen. I am not allow to acknowledge any of my three children on Facebook. So, I respect their privacy and I can understand your need to respect your older children's privacy.

    Good luck in Texas. It will be a big change from California but the house is beautiful and I am sure you will love it.

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  18. I am happy to hear whatever you want to share. Sounds like lots of exciting happenings! Can't believe everyone is so grown up.

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  19. I'm just happy you are back to blogging. Have missed reading about your family.

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  20. Oh the challenges of being parents of adult children . . . we no longer parent them, but will always be their parents. I totally understand the need to focus on what goes on within your home. The adult relationships with our children can bring much joy and much pain. Praying that the Lord gives you strength and wisdom in this new season of your life.

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I find your comments so inspiring! Thanks for visiting our family blog, and sharing your thoughts.