Wednesday, March 16, 2011

Worth So Much More

Heather over at All is Well is one amazing Mom. Long before I became the mother of a child with special needs she was raising her son Davin, who is such an inspiration. What she wrote today gently reminded me that my kids are not worth how much the world values them. Rather, their worth is only limited by how I see them-- and I think they are absolutely priceless!
And more importantly, our Heavenly Father made them in His image, and who am I to put a value on that? Love you heart Heather!

For nearly Davin's entire life, he has been EVALUATED. He has been evaluated by physical therapists, occupational therapists, ed. teachers, speech therapists and psychologists (my favorite....NOT!). When he first started receiving services when he was 6 months old, he would be evaluated in several of these areas every six months. I would get the results of the evaluations in the mail and just be crushed. On paper, it looked like he had made no progress and it ALWAYS talked about how different he was from "typical peers". It took me a couple of years to start putting those nice little papers in a drawer. I would not even read them. This has been my habit (for the most part) for the last 15 or 16 years.

When we moved a psychologist came to our house and evaluated Davin and also gave me some kind of assessment to fill out. I certainly know that on the papers I filled out (they were fill in the dot, not the kind where you could write answers), Davin didn't score very high. I mean, really. Some of the questions were so irrelevant to his life. For the psychologist, I was impressed as I watched Davin really pay attention and answer the questions. I also really do like the psychologist and she has gotten to know Davin and really like him.

However......yesterday I received the official evaluation results in the mail. I was so encouraged by how well he is doing in school and how well he did with the psychologist and by the things his teacher has been saying that I (like a silly girl who didn't know better) decided to take a look at the report. Bad idea. It showed that Davin's IQ was the lowest it could be and that he ranks in or lower than 1% of the population. Really?? Are you kidding me? Have you met this kid?

I shall go back to my old ways now. I will put those papers in the drawer and keep them, but never allow them to define who Davin is. My boy is not what is written on that paper and his abilities can't be measured by the regular standards. I know who he is. Davin knows who he is. He is funny. He is tricky. He is smart. He is loving and he is loved. I will not focus on those papers, those words. I will focus on who Davin is.

9 comments:

  1. Christine, my friend, you have blessed me today. Thank you.

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  2. Gahhh...i could totally relate to that post.
    I got very burnt out prior to Christmas and decided to cancel all evaluations and school meetings so we could have some positive energy.
    I always focus on who my children are and not what the paper says.. (including my foster children)

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  3. Thank you, I needed that today.

    Jill

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  4. Hi! Sometimes children can be evaluated and evaluated these children are then put into special classes which may or may not help them. A word does not make a child it is the child's soul and spirit than make the child.A child is a wonderful gift from God. God does not care what word describes a child all children are beautiful in his eyes.Blessings, Pat

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  5. Thank you! What a wonderful reminder!! :)

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  6. Christine,
    You made my day. That's just what I needed. Thank you so much for posting this.

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  7. Hi Christine,

    Have you seen this video

    http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=UH943Az_lPQ&feature=youtube_gdata_player

    I think it is amazing


    Regards,
    Jeanette

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  8. Christine -

    I have been having some of those evaluations done on my youngest son lately and I am discouraged for him and confused by all that I have been told - none of which rings true for how I see him. I needed perspective - I am going to choose to love on him today and stop evaluating all of his evaluations!

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  9. I always tell that "evaluator"....sure but you don't know my GOD....His Grace is sufficient and wait 'til you see what He does with my child! :)

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I find your comments so inspiring! Thanks for visiting our family blog, and sharing your thoughts.