Sunday, March 27, 2011

In The Desert

John reminded me that we live in the desert. Appropriately so since I feel like I have been wandering in one for the last few months. Funny how I had never made the connection literally until John pointed it out. Thankfully John also pointed out that we are in the desert together.

Since we have moved here, I have yearned for Him more than ever before. Oddly enough, it is in the desert where you are most thirsty. Maybe just maybe we came here for reasons above and beyond John's job.

I said I'd never homeschool, and now I am homeschooling.
I took our doctors and dentists for granted only to realize that God is the One true great Physician.
I always thought there would always be next time to get together with friends and family and now I miss all of them more than words can say.

It has not been easy, even after five months here and it is humbling to still feel overwhelmed by it all. I am normally a very strong woman. But I guess that is prideful, and God knows I need pruning in this area of my life. As I draw closer to Him, I am finding my true purpose in life and that is to love God and allow Him to work in me to further His kingdom. For now, my husband and my children are where He wants me to be, and it took moving to the desert to realize this.

If I am honest with myself I will say that even though I realize this, I still struggle with where He has put me. Like a child who really wants another piece of candy, I want more too. I want to feed the poor, move to Ukraine, open a ranch for troubled teens, fight the injustice, care for orphans, become a missionary-- which is all good, but for now God is telling me to just sit at his feet. Enjoy His presence. Be more like Mary and less like Martha. For now this is where He wants me, so this is where I will be.

14 comments:

  1. Hi!my friend in the Bible it is stated there is a time for everything under heaven .I know your life is hard right. But the God who put you and your family in this California desert to serve Him when the time is right will lead you and your family out of it again .Please be patient because God has big plans for you and your family in this desert area. Praying for you, Pat

    ReplyDelete
  2. I have to laugh (just a little) because it seems impossible for a mother of 11 to be more like Mary than Martha.

    I'm a Martha, too, and though I value stillness and contemplation, my fingers itch to DO. I don't really understand that story....it seems to ME that Jesus is exalting Mary and criticizing poor Martha. Yet, there's a parish near us called St. Martha. Obviously Jesus loved her; maybe he was just telling HER not to be critical of the Marys of the world.

    I think the older we are the harder it is to move.

    ReplyDelete
  3. Beautiful post. Somehow we need the deserts to see God working in our lives when we approach the oasis. Keep on keeping on!

    ReplyDelete
  4. (((Hugs)) Moses was on the back side of the desert tending sheep for 40 years when God called him out to lead His people out of Egypt.

    His timing and plans are perfect.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Funny you should mention Mary & Martha. God has convicted me of my Martha tendencies lately. I am always finding my worth in the things I am able to accomplish (in my life in general, or on a daily basis - how clean my house is, how much school we got done) instead of who I am in Him. It's hard to be a Mary.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Thank you for this post. We are preparing to leave in less than 2 weeks for Russia, and I feel more out of shape than I've ever felt. I'm over 400 pounds now and so I feel like now may not be the right time to adopt more special needs children, yet God has called me to do so and how can I say no? He will surely lift me up to do that which He wants me to do. Thanks for helping me realize this. (((HUGS)))

    ReplyDelete
  7. This post is perfect, Christine. I feel like God is constantly showing me He is enough and that He has me where He has me for a reason.

    ReplyDelete
  8. You can take great comfort in the blessing that He has given you! You have a BEAUTIFUL family!!!!! You are one busy lady, enjoy the rest at His feet!!! Simply wonderful:):):) Thank you for your very sweet comment on my blog!!

    ReplyDelete
  9. The world wouldn't work without Marthas.

    ReplyDelete
  10. Thank you for this post. I am right there, too. Humbling myself. Letting go of my pride and learning to rely on Him.

    ReplyDelete
  11. Thank you, Christine. This is where I need to be, too.

    ReplyDelete
  12. It always seems when I have told the Lord I wouldn't do something, He has lovingly brought me to that place and blessed me in it. I NEVER wanted to live in a large city, I imagined a farmstead in the country, animals, garden, cooking, canning, sewing. We had that for a few years, then the Lord moved us to town, then to a big city. A big city. Lotsa' traffic, lotsa' rude people city. Loved your spiritual thoughts on your move to the desert...I love that you're listening to the Lord's still, small voice.

    ReplyDelete
  13. Amen to that. I am thankful for the different seasons of life the Lord gives us.... 1 season at a time. :)

    ReplyDelete
  14. Oh Christine, great great post!!! Thank you for this, thank you for your honesty and humbleness to share. I needed to read this today.

    Love, Allison

    ReplyDelete

I find your comments so inspiring! Thanks for visiting our family blog, and sharing your thoughts.