Deciding to Move

The last thing we wanted to do was up and move our family. That was never the plan. We felt settled here. We had made our new house a home. We poured our efforts into getting involved with a small group at our church, having the kids get involved in music school, sports, putting in a pool, making new friends, and even seeing our cousins move in right around the corner from us. We had changed this, added that, planted this, and hung up that. It was nice. It is nice.

Besides, we had already left our lovely home where we had spent the last 12 years-- just two years ago. How could we up and move our family again?

This decision did not come lightly. With short term stability at work not feeling very stable for John let alone long term stability and his long term growth looking less and less promising if not virtually non-existent we both had to start discussing the what ifs.

What if John suddenly lost his job?

What would we do for health insurance?

How long could we last on savings if he couldn't find another job?

How much of a pay cut could we survive on?

With the unemployment rate only getting higher and friends and family all around us losing their jobs, what would we do if we found ourselves in the same position? It was not just the two of us, we had more than a couple of kids-- how would we make ends meet if John no longer had a job? This was something that was an underlying stress on our marriage-- not a good thing. I wanted to see my husband happy, excited about going to work, thrilled to come home to all of us because he had had an awesome day. Though he pressed on, I could see that lots was on his mind.

So we let our ideas soar. We imagined moving to places like Ukraine, out of state.... if that was what God was nudging us to do. We wondered if this was God trying to tell us something. We prayed for direction, we asked for God to close and open doors.

And we waited.

And then a door opened.

And my first reaction was-- Close that door! No way are we going that way again!

So we prayed some more, looked at ways to stay where we are, and considered the ramifications of moving 14 children to Southern California.

Believe me, there are so many reasons to stay put, but as we considered the alternative, John and I came to the conclusion that difficult as it is going to be, this is the best thing for our family.

Not because we are bored with where we live.

Not because we need a bigger home-- although we are looking at homes with at least one more bathroom and more land.

Not because we need to do something new.

John starts his new job in less than two weeks. For now, he will be gone during the week and travel home on the weekends. None of us are happy about that. Forget the stress of finding a new home to buy, selling this home, paying off the balance of our current mortgage after we sell it because we are upside down, getting acquainted with a whole new school district, and moving away from family-- the impact of John being gone during the week doesn't even compare.

He is my other half-- we are one-- and without him here to come home after work-- well I might as well start planning my weekly menus of pancakes, cereal, oatmeal, sandwiches, mac and cheese.

Serious, this is going to be hard on all of us. I can't even begin to think how it will effect the kids-- albeit only temporary.

So we are pressing ahead. Moving forward. Looking at homes down south. In fact I have done this a few times and stayed with a dear friend who we will hopefully move by. I took Anastasia and Julia one time and it was such a bonding thing for Anastasia to give her input on our future new home. She let me know that she would be happy in each and every home that we looked at! Julia's input was a little more helpful as she pointed out good things and bad about the homes. We have put our home on the market, began the deep cleaning, decluttering, and down sizing to get the house "show ready." Today we have our first showing.

We are praying it is our last. And we are praying that one of our offers down south will be accepted. With nearly every home we have looked at being a short pay-- it is taking alot longer to get an answer.

One day I am happy and excited, the next I am feeling overwhelmed at the task ahead of us, and yet all I can keep my eyes focused on is Him.

He will walk us through this-- and in turn I am going to be joyful. Hopefully that will keep me preoccupied instead of worrying about everything else.