After All These Years

Nearly seventeen years ago, John and I eloped. You can say he was my Prince Charming--- whisking me off on a white horse. I was most certainly a princess in need of rescuing if you ever did see one. I knew he was the best guy I had ever dated in my whole life, heck---once, he even invited my sister out on our date to the ballet, where we both fell asleep. Besides, my Mother thought he was the greatest thing since sliced bread. So like I said, after two and a half months of dating, I married John--- for better or for worse.

That weekend, we had dinner at the top of Harvey's Casino in Lake Tahoe in a fancy restaurant. When a complete stranger pinned a large bill on my dress as we were leaving, it was all the confirmation I needed--- I married the man I was supposed to. However, I had quite a few things that I was still dealing with that I knew put a strain on our marriage. I crossed my fingers that it would work out nonetheless.

Six months later we renewed our vows in front of friends and family--- so that my Mom could see her first daughter get married. Then it was off on a real honeymoon-- a cruise to Mexico and then Disneyland.


We loved each other very much-- but our emotions ran high as did our worldly desires and often times I think we were barely surviving. We both felt that divorce was not an option yet the thought crossed my mind when we were in the midst of an argument. I trusted that he would never cheat on me yet my insecurity fed my doubt when times were tough. I loved him so much, yet at that point my idea of showing him love was making him an orange cinnamon roll cake for his birthday. I was young, naive, and quite frankly, didn't know what it was to really love someone.

Three years into our marriage, we were invited to a church where we each began our relationship with God. What we thought was a good marriage before, instantly paled in comparison to a marriage grounded in God. Of course we continue to have our ups and downs-- but the one thing that I love, love, love about my man is that he answers to our Heavenly Father who always reminds him what a marriage with real love is.

Ephesians 5:21-33 (New Message)
Out of respect for Christ, be courteously reverent to one another. Wives, understand and support your husbands in ways that show your support for Christ. The husband provides leadership to his wife the way Christ does to his church, not by domineering but by cherishing. So just as the church submits to Christ as he exercises such leadership, wives should likewise submit to their husbands.

Husbands, go all out in your love for your wives, exactly as Christ did for the church—a love marked by giving, not getting. Christ's love makes the church whole. His words evoke her beauty. Everything he does and says is designed to bring the best out of her, dressing her in dazzling white silk, radiant with holiness. And that is how husbands ought to love their wives. They're really doing themselves a favor—since they're already "one" in marriage.

No one abuses his own body, does he? No, he feeds and pampers it. That's how Christ treats us, the church, since we are part of his body. And this is why a man leaves father and mother and cherishes his wife. No longer two, they become "one flesh." This is a huge mystery, and I don't pretend to understand it all. What is clearest to me is the way Christ treats the church. And this provides a good picture of how each husband is to treat his wife, loving himself in loving her, and how each wife is to honor her husband.

John is such an amazing husband. I feel like his radiant bride everyday even when my own actions don't deserve such unconditional love. The issues that plagued our marriage early on--- God brought closure to. He gave me strength to do things that I was never able to do on my own. God provided me with a best friend to lean on in my darkest hours.

Thanks for asking me to marry you. It has been a blessed journey this far.

P.S. It isn't even our anniversary.