Being Uncomfortable With Him

Today we had a big appointment up at Valley Children's Hospital with the whole cranio-facial team. Dennis saw the cleft palate nurse, the plastic surgeon, the speech therapist, the pediatric ophthalmologist, and the social worker. We were there for nearly four hours.

But it was a good visit.

Dennis is approaching 30 pounds and is one tall drink of water.

Look at all 35 inches of him!

They addressed his speech and have scheduled an evaluation along with a hearing test. And most importantly, I honestly shared my concerns with Dennis' surgeon about his eye. Just in the past week, Dennis has started yanking it out (the first three weeks he was fine) usually when he goes to bed. Yes, it is infected (and we have already started antibiotics) so that may be contributing to the discomfort of the prosthetic eye, but I am beginning to wonder if it is causing him pain. His whole eyelid is red and raw----- and I actually wore my old contacts lenses yesterday just so that we could be in pain together, and boy was I uncomfortable all day....... so I can only imagine his discomfort that he lives through everyday. Now I remember why I don't wear them.

*Insert quick story just to prove how much he is not liking his eye* After we got home from our appointment I fed Dennis lunch. When I grabbed his napkin off his tray to throw it away I didn't notice that his eye was out until I turned back around to get him down. I started looking all over for it and tore the seat cover off of his chair hoping it was under it. When I couldn't find it, I seriously had convinced myself that he had swallowed his eye. I was not happy thinking that I would have to go foraging through his poop to retrieve his eye.

Finally, in a last stitch effort to find it, I asked Dennis,

"Where did you put your eye?"

And you know what that little tomato did?

He went over and pointed to the napkin in the trashcan.

So, back to my dilemma. I feel like a horrible Mom making Dennis wear his eye. Sure he is fine right now as I am typing this with no sign of pain or discomfort, but other times I think he can't wait for the chance to yank it out. I am so torn.

Since this is a temporary prosthetic and the permanent one should be more comfortable, the surgeon is deciding when Dennis will have his next surgery. The new eye can only be made after Dennis takes an impression which won't be done until he is under anesthesia. The surgeon feels it may be to soon to perform another operation which could delay Dennis getting a better fitting eye.

Bottom line--- it is quite complicated and I am asking you guys to pray.

Pray for clarity.

Pray for direction.

Pray for healing.

Pray for comfort.

And pray that I find peace as I continue to struggle with my baby's day to day discomfort.

Please and thank you.