Anna wanted a trim. I threw in a free blow dry and style.
Annalyn needed a full cut and layer. I also threw in a blow dry and style.
In fact, I somehow got talked into doing all of the girls' hair. Hmmm, maybe I should start charging for my services. Having a live-in hair stylist must be nice. Just kidding, I love doing my daughters' hair.
John and I got to sleep in until 9 o'clock this morning. And to top that off, we were served pancakes for breakfast. I had to admit that Julia makes better pancakes than me, they were that yummy. After Christmas decorations were put away, and laundry was done, we discussed going roller skating. The local rink was having a 1/2 price special on Thursday nights, so we decided to take everyone skating this evening. First we ate out at 'In and Out'.
It was nice how the older kids chipped in some of their own money totally voluntarily. I was really proud of them for doing that.
Two other adoptive families joined us. One family used to live across the street from us-- funny how we adopted and moved at the same time. The other is my friend Julie who lives not too far from us. Her kids get along great with mine!
It was fun-- us three women yakking up a storm. Yak, yak, yak, oh and some Dennis chasing too.
Here are a few pictures of the kids skating. If only my camera was better at taking long distance, active shots you would see the smiles on my kids' faces.
Here are a few pictures of the kids skating. If only my camera was better at taking long distance, active shots you would see the smiles on my kids' faces.
Jonny did much better skating this time! It was great to see how much fun he had.
He met a little boy, which would normally be a great thing because it means that Jonny is becoming a little more outgoing with age. What really was a shocking disappointment was when he brought the little punk boy over to meet Dennis and I and the little boy immediately said he was going to be sick. I thought he meant it literally. When I asked him what was wrong, he pointed to Dennis and indicated that Dennis' eye was what was sickening him.
"That is not very nice to say. His eye can't make you sick."
The little boy continued to pretend to throw up.
"Hasn't your Mommy and Daddy taught you not say mean things?"
The boy continued with the act, and I so wanted to grab him by the arm and march him to where his parents were and give them a piece of my mind but I simply said,
"Well get out of here then because I don't need sick kids around my boy."
Ugh, his parents need to be taught a thing or two. Fast forward to the end of the night. That same boy was harassing Anna and as we were leaving we saw him being manhandled by a smoking adult who told was screaming for him to shut up. Poor boy.
40 inspiring thoughts:
♥ Looks like fun! That's too bad about the little boy. I would have been thinking the same things as you at first too. It sounds like he's in need of some tender loving care!
I dated a guy once who had a daughter and we were at Burger King and there was a very cute little boy in a wheelchair and the daughter laughed and said what's wrong with him, is he to lazy to walk? I about smacked her but realized she didn't know any better. (she was maybe 5 or 6 at the time). So daddy and I had a very long heart felt talk about it and she was put in place very quickly. My children have learned early as well because that is our jobs to teach them that not everyone looks the same or acts the same.
I cannot believe a boy that age would act so terrible. I don't even look at Dennis' eye. I go right to his beautiful smile and see him as a wonderful blessing.
I'm so glad you shared this story. It is a constant reminder to all parents that we need to keep those talks coming with our children.
I'm not sure I would have handled myself so well. Kuddo's to you for keeping your cool.
I would be mortified if my child behaved the way that little boy did. I guess he truly doesn't know better though. Ugh!
Glad you all had a fun night though!
Thanks for popping by my blog- my New Years resolution was to give it a good try. I love reading about how other people live their lives. I stumbled upon your blog a month or so ago and have been amazed by your wonderful family. Through reading it i have become very interested in adoption and when the time comes to start my family it will definitely be something i think strongly about. You have beautiful children and it made me sad that Dennis was the target of unkindness. I imagine the boy would have been much better behaved and have a better understanding of the joy of diversity if he had caring parents like yourself.
Thank you so much for sharing your story.
Happy New Year to you all.
I used to LOVE rollerskating as a kid. I bet the kids really really enjoyed it.
I'm sorry you had such a bad experience with that boy. Dealing with other kids can be really tough. They say it like it is and it can just stab you right in the heart. Most kids generally don't mean to be rude or insensitive, they are just being inquisitive, but there are kids, like the one you encountered, that are purposely down-right cruel. And it's tough to take. I dread everyday that someone will say something nasty to me (or even to Kaia) about Kaia.
I'm glad you were able to have a fun night in spite of that child's behavior. That kind of thing has to one the hardest things to deal with as a Mom.
Love how you cut the girls hair. My goodness I can barely do a pony tail. It's a good thing Abby doesn't have much hair...yet.
..
Some children can be mean and cruel, however, they are what they learn. I find it more distressing when adults are the ones who stare and make rude comments.
One time at Zheres, our local supermarket, the dairy guy made a snide comment that my child was acting like an animal. (I cried..and cried after I walked away.) However the next day I went to management and complained..
This dairy guy never said a nasty thing to us again...(i'm sure he thinks it) but i cannot change that.
xo
hugs to you
To bad for the boy...you are what you live, huh???
There's always more than one side to a story, isn't there? It's so important for us to remember that when striving to live gracefully. I've often received reminders of that.
Sometimes our children have to be taught to accept the differences God has placed in people. Aren't your children learning a valuable lesson as they grow up together?!
I just showed the picture of your entire family to my 6 and 5 year olds and asked them what they thought about all of those kids in one family. My six year old said, "Wow! That's awesome!" We are expecting our fifth and my five year old was already talking about us having another one! I love it!
Which is sadder?? The idea that you and Dennis had to put up with that or knowing that that poor kid probably has to put up with the same thing. But thus are bullies born.
Oddly I woke up this morning thinking about the poor boy who bullied Ilya. He was abandoned by his father when he was about 5. Some kids act out their pain and fear by being mean.
When we were in line for bumper cars at Wild Adventures two little girls kept looking at Jasmine and then whispering. They kept talking about her scar on her neck (which is really bad) and her fingers (which are missing the end two bones. I ignored it at first because people do notice but they kept going on and on about the fingers (glad they couldn't see her feet!!) so I finally turned around "that's the way she was born" right to their faces. Honestly! Is there nothing better to talk about at the amusement park??
I'm afraid I would have had a real urge to knock the kid at the ice skating rink smack on his rear!
My best friend is a dwarf and she gets a lot of rude stares / comments. Children are curious and sometimes rude too - she uses that time to educate them. I get angry at some responses and stares, but she reminds me God made her the way she is and she uses it as an educational time - once they know, their curiousity is curbed and she is always so kind to people who I'd like to tell off! She is a true Christian witness and I admire her so much. Dennis is made wonderfully by God! He is blessed - and that boy sounds like he isn't as blessed.
What fun you guys all have! Sorry about the child at the rink. :(
When I lived in southern Ca, I LOVED In-N-Out Burger. They had the best grilled cheese.
Probably a good thing that boy's parent(s) weren't there. Seems that those type of people end up making things worse. Isn't it ridiculous to hear a "stupid" parent try to correct their child in the moment? It is more embarrassing then if they don't say anything at all.
I miss skating. I was really good at it when I was young.
OH Christine! We have been dealing with bullies for 27 plus years and it never changes. The bullies of today, are the product of the bullies of yesterday, who bullied my son, and stared and made rude comments then.
It is easier to handle coming from a child rather than an adult. My heart hearts for you and Dennis, as you begin to work yourself in the school system of the future and see TRUE UGLY Prejudice in the raw, in ADULTS, educated adults. I know it will happen, and your heart will be challenged to forgive and at the same time protect. This will become a fine art in you that GOD will be the one to perfect.
Yesterday, we were at the store and the checker, well meaning but obviously ignorant of social graces said something VERY LOUD to Sarah. Sarah has a prosthetic leg and a brace on her hand from surgery. The woman said something like, "OH MY, WHAT DID YOU DO TO YOURSELF? ARE YOU TRYING TO DESTROY YOURSELF ALL AT ONCE?" And when I say Loud I mean LOUD! Sarah looked at me and then smiled at the woman and said, "No, I was born this way". To which she became obsessively kind and treated her like she was now retarded. LOL Erika was next, with no feet, arthrogryposis and in a wheel chair.... The woman said nothing to her, but continued to treat her like SHE was retarded. When we go out of line, I noticed the two women behind us looking at us with great sympathy after going through that. As they walked by, Erika said, "mom was it me or was that lady trying to be overly nice?" LOL Both ladies burst out laughing. It was quite awkward.
And yes, children MUST be taught to be kind. However, you ran into the child who's parents should not be spoken to, because it might result in abuse of the child. Hopefully he will learn kindness at school.
They say that children reflect their parents... and that boy did.
It is sad. :(
We spent our morning cutting hair too! LOL
Great job with the hair cut. I cut my husbands hair, but wouldn't consider trying long hair!
I'm sorry about your experience with that little boy. I'm sorry for him too that he doesn't know any better.
Roller skating sounds like fun! Did you do "YMCA"? Regarding the little boy, I still remember when I was teaching there'd be a problem child and then we'd have a parent/teacher conference and say a big,"A-ha!" The apple rarely falls far from the tree.
My nephew had a birth defect that affected his eye as well. It was very hard on my sister and her son. My sister is not nearly as strong as you are. She had taken him once to get his photos taken at a department store and the photographer started to make fun of him. My sister left crying. My BIL went back to the store and talked with the manager.
People can be so mean. I will pray that this will never happen again to you or to Dennis but if it does you and Dennis have the strength to protect your feeling.
Joy
That is horrible. I have a friend whose daughter has a disease that has left her bald and she sometimes gets rude comments. That poor child no wonder he said those things if that's how he's treated. He probably hasn't been taught how to treat people and what is aceeptable.
I am not trying to be mean but are you honestly suprised by the childs reaction? The child should be taught to be nice but you are used to seeing Dennis everyday--not his eye but Dennis. I have to admit that when you first posted Dennis' picture on FRUA, I thought it was a cruel joke. That is the main reason that I came to your blogsite and have since come to look forward to your posts. I think your kids are all adorable but I can understand his reaction but not his words upon meeting Dennis. This is one of the main reasons that I feel you owe it to Dennis to do as much costemically as possible. Keep up the good work. Kristin
Hey, we should combine our talents and open a salon ... you know, in our spare time. HA
Love roller skating! What a fun time. I'm just curious, what was Jonny's reaction to his new "friend's" comment about Dennis?
I've been a 'secret follower' of your blog for a while, but felt I just had to comment. For Dennis, I know this won't be the last time or even the worst time of facing other people's prejudices. That old saying, "sticks and stones may break my bones but names will never hurt me" is just wrong names and insults do hurt. I pray that Dennis is strong enough for everything the world hurls at him.
I'm sorry that you and Dennis had to experience the cruel words of the little boy. After you saw and heard his father, it explained his actions and words. Ignorance breeds ignorance. You were able to keep your cool. I know I would not have been able to with my temper.
Thankfully you are with a good group of doctors that are doing all that is possible to help Dennis. If he hadn't become part of your family here in the US, those medical options wouldn't have been available.
The girls are lucky to have their own personal hair stylist and the price is right. Your bathroom is so huge that you all can fit in there and have a fun time of it.
I think you handled that really well with the rude little boy. You tried to calmly teach him and redirect him, and when that didn't work, just sent him away. It is sad to know that the reason he acted like that is probably because he really HASN'T been taught any better!!!
Mrs Reed! Mrs Reed! Look, you made the list! You're officially one of the top mom bloggers!!! I was led to this link by MckMom (she was on it too) and I saw you there!!! Congratulations!
"#47 Smiles and Trials
Devoted mom of 11, Christine is the epitome of an unselfish and loving parent. Spending her life focusing on adoption of children that need not just any home, but her home. Watching Dennis grow and all the ways the family has helped him, leaves us somewhere between wonder and amazement. This is a family that has made 2008 worth blogging."
Here's the link-
http://www.momdot.com/topmomblogs/
Ah, roller skating, that brings back memories! Glad you had fun AND had In n Out. Haven't eaten there for years. Yum. I'm sorry about that poor boy's rotten comments. I'm sure that will be one of the hardest things to deal with as a mom.
Jen
You can come cut my hair! I need a trim and color. :)
That is terrible about that little boy. I would have definitely handled it the way you did and told him to leave you all alone, but as you saw, the reality is that kids act that way because someone is treating them that way. It's sad. But what can you do.....
Erica
So sorry!
How TERRIBLY rude!!
If that boy were mine, he would never forget the night he acted that way.
Your haircuts look great, BTW.
I have learned that when little children act they way they must have not been taught properly about people who are different. I try to take compassion and change the subject toward the child and start asking questions about themselves. I try to take an interest in them. It works most of the time and you can usually tell the child is in need of love or attention. Oh how our world needs Jesus to change the souls of the world. I do differ this time with your reaction to the boy. But at the same time I see why you said what you did.
That is so awful. I wish he had better parents.
What kind of fast food is is In and Out? Never heard of it.
The skating rink looks wonderful!
You are such an awesome hair stylist, Christine! Wish you could do my hair as well, but alas, I live too far away. :-(
I agree that that child's parents need to teach him manners--what is appropriate to say, and what is not appropriate to say & should be kept to yourself. We all have moments when we are taken aback by another person's appearance, whether it is eyes, clothes, strange makeup, language, attitude, or whatever, but that is never any excuse for being rude about it.
Aloha from Hawaii...I am so blessed to read about your family and the love you and your wonderful husband has for children. Its truly God-driven. We have 8 children (23,20,19,10,7,7,5 14months). 3 of our children we are still going thru adoption. I love and am amazed by your compassion. God Bless and BELIEVE ~Liz
You've been nominated!!!!!
Go to momdot.com and you will see that you are among the top 50 mom blogs of 2008!!!
They have wonderful things to say about you
Suzanne
REgarding the little boy, its all about ignorance isn't it? We have a special needs child in our family. We go in public and kids are swarming around her, pushing ahead, moving her walker, like she doesn't exist. And their parents are not watching their children or using it as a training moment.
I've talked to my daughter a lot about this. Its still hard to know what she might say about something we've not covered. Yesterday we saw a very bald child in the store and I know 'chemo'...and we haven't discussed this. My daughter started to say something, I shushed her. Later she said, 'that girl has a cute shirt'. ha. ya never know. But ya gotta try.... Take care
Okay, Christine, between the haircuts and general super mom activities, I need you to particiapte in the New Year Resolutions list I tagged you with on my blog!
I'm sorry you had to deal with that little boy's mean comments. You handled it beautifully.
I love the picture of your beautiful family and am encouraged by your adoption(s). I am longing to add to our family in this manner too.
Thank you for visiting my blog. I'm looking forward to reading more on yours.
Blessings,
Leslie
www.homeschoolblogger.com/LeslieNelsen
Hi, as lurker who has officially 'delurked' tonight, I just wanted to agree with so many of the other positive posters. Also wondered if maybe that little boy was missing out on so obviously being as loved as your littlest guy & the rest of your family & wanted some (even if negative) attention, too. Sounds like it.
Was also wondering if you ever sleep? You have an awesome family!
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