How are all of you going to ring in the New Year? We are planning to go roller skating in a little while with some other families and friends. It should be lots of fun! The kids are really looking forward to it, and John and I are too. They are going to have a balloon drop and lots of games!
As I get ready to finish the 2007 chapter of my book and move on to 2008, I will keep this quote in mind as a constant reminder of how big and powerful my God is. Even though I really don't remember who said it, hopefully you will find comfort in it like I do. I find that it especially applies to the adoption journey we are on as we face obstacles, curve balls, and the ever consuming beast better known as "waiting.".
"God who is big enough to make you afraid by what he asks, is the same God who is powerful enough to accomplish all he is about to ask of you!"
Monday, December 31, 2007
Sunday, December 30, 2007
3 quick stories
Here are some things that I wanted to share. You know the things that only other moms find cute and worthy of sharing with others?
1. One day last week, Andrew hit Jonny because he took one of his toys. I sent him to his room for a while. Later, Andrew came down to apologize to me in his sweetest most sincerest voice. "Mom, I'm sorry for hurting your son." Not, I'm sorry for hurting my brother or I'm sorry for hurting Jonny, but, I'm sorry for hurting your son. And to think, Andrew is only five. :)
2. Today we took down the Christmas tree and put away the decorations. Some of the ornaments broke, and so I went to throw them away. Nothing big. "Noooooooo Mama, I want them," Rachel said. Funny thing is, she always does this and has a collection of "junk" in her room. So does Anna. I can't throw anything away without them asking for it. My old check register, expired pizza coupons, empty bottles of shampoo, a broken coffee mug, you name it, and they want it. For the most part, I let them have it, and eventually we go through their things and discard it after they have had it a while. I don't mind, although there are times when I just want to get rid of it. I'm sure it has something to do with their life back in Russia and Ukraine. Rachel told me and her Grandma how she unraveled old sweaters and knit new scarves with pencils. Talk about recycling and being resourceful. :)
3. Did you know that William thinks I "rock" because I serve Bagel Bites? Isn't it nice knowing that the smallest of things can be so important to our children? Especially for William who needs to know what his next meal is going to be. His asking is just something that I have come to expect from William meal after meal.
1. One day last week, Andrew hit Jonny because he took one of his toys. I sent him to his room for a while. Later, Andrew came down to apologize to me in his sweetest most sincerest voice. "Mom, I'm sorry for hurting your son." Not, I'm sorry for hurting my brother or I'm sorry for hurting Jonny, but, I'm sorry for hurting your son. And to think, Andrew is only five. :)
2. Today we took down the Christmas tree and put away the decorations. Some of the ornaments broke, and so I went to throw them away. Nothing big. "Noooooooo Mama, I want them," Rachel said. Funny thing is, she always does this and has a collection of "junk" in her room. So does Anna. I can't throw anything away without them asking for it. My old check register, expired pizza coupons, empty bottles of shampoo, a broken coffee mug, you name it, and they want it. For the most part, I let them have it, and eventually we go through their things and discard it after they have had it a while. I don't mind, although there are times when I just want to get rid of it. I'm sure it has something to do with their life back in Russia and Ukraine. Rachel told me and her Grandma how she unraveled old sweaters and knit new scarves with pencils. Talk about recycling and being resourceful. :)
3. Did you know that William thinks I "rock" because I serve Bagel Bites? Isn't it nice knowing that the smallest of things can be so important to our children? Especially for William who needs to know what his next meal is going to be. His asking is just something that I have come to expect from William meal after meal.
Heavenly Cookies
These cookies are the best. Just ask anybody in my family. Here are some pictures of a couple of the kids really enjoying their cookie. Rachel has already requested them for her birthday next year instead of cake.
Caleb - 11 years old
Julia - almost 10 years old
Adam -12 years old - my oldest - usually doesn't like me to take pictures of him
William - 8 years old
Click here for the recipe for these oh so delicious cookies. I think the cookies are even better if you lower your oven to 325 and cook for only 10 minutes.
Caleb - 11 years old
Julia - almost 10 years old
Adam -12 years old - my oldest - usually doesn't like me to take pictures of him
William - 8 years old
Click here for the recipe for these oh so delicious cookies. I think the cookies are even better if you lower your oven to 325 and cook for only 10 minutes.
Saturday, December 29, 2007
Jonny gets down
This is a 25 second video of my youngest son Jonny playing Guitar Hero. From the funky dancing to the lip licking focus he has, it is sure to make you smile. He's only four years old and plays much better than I do.
Celebrating 14 years
Usually John and I look forward to a one on one date together for our anniversary, but we instead chose to spend it with the whole family. We went to the skate park earlier and skated up an appetite so that we could all enjoy a nice Mexican dinner at a local restaurant. Did I mention that as I was trying to drop into a junior half pipe, I fell smack down on my bottom? It was one nasty fall, but after a rub down of Ben Gay and a heating pad, I felt somewhat better.....enough to go out to dinner.
Later, I'm thinking that I will get a nice back massage. ;)
Connie, thanks for the shirt. It fits great and is really pretty. The girls wanted to know why I was dressed so fancy.
Friday, December 28, 2007
Don't cry over spilled milk
I had to remind myself of this when my sweet, dear William tried to help me with lunch and dropped the gallon of milk. Hey, my floor needed to be cleaned anyways.
I'm not Mama and neither is she
But it's all relative, right?
Let me explain.
Of course, I'm Mama. But,......... I'm Mama to a select family of ten children. Nothing more, nothing less.
Yesterday, the two girls that I watched for my friend happened to call me Mama twice. It was deja vu because two years ago my own two daughters were calling my friend Mama too. At that time, I took it very personal when she told me, and I saw RAD written all over their face. Just like I explained to my girls back then that my friend was Mrs _____, I explained to the girls yesterday that my name is Mrs. Christine.
"Meenya Zahvoot Mrs. Christine." Perfect Russian, I tell ya. :)
I think they understood because they stopped calling me Mama, just like my girls stopped calling our neighbor Mama after that one incident, but I can't help but wonder how long it really takes a newly adopted child to grasp the concept that now they really only have one Mama now and forever.
Thankfully, I gave up my theory on the RAD (reactive attachment disorder) or I might have been pushing for more attachment with my girls when actually we were going at a nice and comfortable pace. It's okay to call me a loon about this, but I wonder if pushing (what others call promoting) for attachment to counteract RAD doesn't actually push a child away and hinder attachment. I'm not talking about the regular attachment stuff like physical touch, staying at home so that there aren't lots of other adults around, etc., but I have read some pretty bizarre stuff in the name of promoting a healthy attachment and many of the families that practice this are having one heck of a time bonding with their child.
I think it goes so much deeper than just practicing what these books say to do. There has to be a lot of love and deep desire to make yourself feel the same way you are expecting your child to feel about you. Please don't take this like I am bashing the treatment of RAD, I just wanted to throw it out there, and I didn't even start out this post with ending it like this in mind.
Let me explain.
Of course, I'm Mama. But,......... I'm Mama to a select family of ten children. Nothing more, nothing less.
Yesterday, the two girls that I watched for my friend happened to call me Mama twice. It was deja vu because two years ago my own two daughters were calling my friend Mama too. At that time, I took it very personal when she told me, and I saw RAD written all over their face. Just like I explained to my girls back then that my friend was Mrs _____, I explained to the girls yesterday that my name is Mrs. Christine.
"Meenya Zahvoot Mrs. Christine." Perfect Russian, I tell ya. :)
I think they understood because they stopped calling me Mama, just like my girls stopped calling our neighbor Mama after that one incident, but I can't help but wonder how long it really takes a newly adopted child to grasp the concept that now they really only have one Mama now and forever.
Thankfully, I gave up my theory on the RAD (reactive attachment disorder) or I might have been pushing for more attachment with my girls when actually we were going at a nice and comfortable pace. It's okay to call me a loon about this, but I wonder if pushing (what others call promoting) for attachment to counteract RAD doesn't actually push a child away and hinder attachment. I'm not talking about the regular attachment stuff like physical touch, staying at home so that there aren't lots of other adults around, etc., but I have read some pretty bizarre stuff in the name of promoting a healthy attachment and many of the families that practice this are having one heck of a time bonding with their child.
I think it goes so much deeper than just practicing what these books say to do. There has to be a lot of love and deep desire to make yourself feel the same way you are expecting your child to feel about you. Please don't take this like I am bashing the treatment of RAD, I just wanted to throw it out there, and I didn't even start out this post with ending it like this in mind.
Thursday, December 27, 2007
Another day with the kids
Today I got to feel what it is like to have 13 kids........ two of them fresh from Russia. Our friends adopted from Russia one month ago, and had to go to work so I offered to watch the three of their kids, and it was really fun. They behaved quite well, and I secretly used the day to brush up on my Russian.
The two girls were drawn to the roller blades in our garage and got plenty of help from the other girls who were more than willing to teach them to skate.
The girls brought crafts that everyone enjoyed doing after we got back from the park. It was a nice activity to help them wind down. After, we watched Shrek 2, and even though the movie was in English, the girls sat through the whole thing. Amazing, but I am guessing that holding our dog in their lap helped.
Here are the girls playing dress-up.
Here is Julia and Cassidy goofing around.
Here are the older kids relaxing after our excursion to the park.
On a lighter note, I've convinced my girls that the best way to flirt is by winking.
I think Rachel and Anna have mastered it. I've yet to convince the other girls to let me take a picture of them while practicing the lost art of winking.
I told them that this is how I flirt with their father. Attractive, huh?
Here is Sveta loading the dishwasher. I had to teach her that you have to load the taller things on the bottom or else the basket won't close.
The two girls were drawn to the roller blades in our garage and got plenty of help from the other girls who were more than willing to teach them to skate.
The girls brought crafts that everyone enjoyed doing after we got back from the park. It was a nice activity to help them wind down. After, we watched Shrek 2, and even though the movie was in English, the girls sat through the whole thing. Amazing, but I am guessing that holding our dog in their lap helped.
Here are the girls playing dress-up.
Here is Julia and Cassidy goofing around.
Here are the older kids relaxing after our excursion to the park.
On a lighter note, I've convinced my girls that the best way to flirt is by winking.
I think Rachel and Anna have mastered it. I've yet to convince the other girls to let me take a picture of them while practicing the lost art of winking.
I told them that this is how I flirt with their father. Attractive, huh?
Here is Sveta loading the dishwasher. I had to teach her that you have to load the taller things on the bottom or else the basket won't close.
Wednesday, December 26, 2007
Zha Zha about Sveta
Here is another blog entry devoted to my wonderful Sviet (short for Sveta).
Remember the story I told you I would share about Sveta and her new dog Zha Zha? Well here it is... I just thought it would be better told on a different day other than Christmas. As we were in the middle of finishing up opening presents on Christmas eve, Sveta comes out of the bathroom to tell me that her doggy just went potty. She begged me to come watch and take a picture too of cute, little Zha Zha. I humored her, and sure enough she held her doggy over the toilet and even wiped her when she was done. ??????? "Who thinks of things like this?" I'm thinking and then I remember that I already know the answer. My daughter Sveta. Later on after dessert, she announced again that Zha Zha had to go potty.
"How do you know?" Anna asks, probably thinking that this dog is similar to her doll that pees when she gives it a bottle.
"Zha Zha tells me Anna," Sveta answers smartly.
"Really? Let me see." Anna replies as she follows Sveta to the bathroom.
Oh brother, I'm thinking. Sveta pretends that Zha Zha goes potty again, and Anna acts like she got gypped out of seeing the real thing. I simply told Anna, that she should have known that
Sveta was just pretending.
Sveta got these soft and furry socks for Christmas. She loves them very much because they are so soft and cozy. Sveta has pretty significant sensory issues, and she is very particular about clothing. She loves anything that is really soft, and can't stand anything that she perceives to be itchy. She even gets mad if I wear what she calls a scratchy sweater. So knowing this, I had to get her these socks when I saw them. And yes, she spent at least 10 minutes discussing with me last night, how soft they were. She even asked me to rub them to feel how soft they were so that I would know that she was not lying about how soft they were. Don't worry Sveta, I believe you how soft they are, that's why I bought them. :)
On another note, last night Sveta shared something out of the blue with us. She pointed to an electrical outlet with a plug and told us that in Russia, the doctors put wires on her head and that is why she is not very smart. She pointed to her temples and forehead and indicated that there was four of these wires. I'm very surprised that she told us this, however, I don't doubt her at all. I'm sure they were measuring her brainwaves or doing some sort of testing and because she didn't understand, she just assumes that the wires had something to do with why her brain doesn't work exactly like everyone elses. We listened and tried to explain a bit, but it is hard to get her to fully understand. Oh well, I'm sure there will be alot more explaining to do as time goes on. It just makes me a little sad that this all could have been avoided if Sveta's birth mother had not drank when she was pregnant.
But guess what, tonight Sveta learned how to play Guitar Hero.... and she did pretty good on the beginning level. And both John and I were really impressed. :) Now she doesn't just have to sit and watch anymore!
Remember the story I told you I would share about Sveta and her new dog Zha Zha? Well here it is... I just thought it would be better told on a different day other than Christmas. As we were in the middle of finishing up opening presents on Christmas eve, Sveta comes out of the bathroom to tell me that her doggy just went potty. She begged me to come watch and take a picture too of cute, little Zha Zha. I humored her, and sure enough she held her doggy over the toilet and even wiped her when she was done. ??????? "Who thinks of things like this?" I'm thinking and then I remember that I already know the answer. My daughter Sveta. Later on after dessert, she announced again that Zha Zha had to go potty.
"How do you know?" Anna asks, probably thinking that this dog is similar to her doll that pees when she gives it a bottle.
"Zha Zha tells me Anna," Sveta answers smartly.
"Really? Let me see." Anna replies as she follows Sveta to the bathroom.
Oh brother, I'm thinking. Sveta pretends that Zha Zha goes potty again, and Anna acts like she got gypped out of seeing the real thing. I simply told Anna, that she should have known that
Sveta was just pretending.
Sveta got these soft and furry socks for Christmas. She loves them very much because they are so soft and cozy. Sveta has pretty significant sensory issues, and she is very particular about clothing. She loves anything that is really soft, and can't stand anything that she perceives to be itchy. She even gets mad if I wear what she calls a scratchy sweater. So knowing this, I had to get her these socks when I saw them. And yes, she spent at least 10 minutes discussing with me last night, how soft they were. She even asked me to rub them to feel how soft they were so that I would know that she was not lying about how soft they were. Don't worry Sveta, I believe you how soft they are, that's why I bought them. :)
On another note, last night Sveta shared something out of the blue with us. She pointed to an electrical outlet with a plug and told us that in Russia, the doctors put wires on her head and that is why she is not very smart. She pointed to her temples and forehead and indicated that there was four of these wires. I'm very surprised that she told us this, however, I don't doubt her at all. I'm sure they were measuring her brainwaves or doing some sort of testing and because she didn't understand, she just assumes that the wires had something to do with why her brain doesn't work exactly like everyone elses. We listened and tried to explain a bit, but it is hard to get her to fully understand. Oh well, I'm sure there will be alot more explaining to do as time goes on. It just makes me a little sad that this all could have been avoided if Sveta's birth mother had not drank when she was pregnant.
But guess what, tonight Sveta learned how to play Guitar Hero.... and she did pretty good on the beginning level. And both John and I were really impressed. :) Now she doesn't just have to sit and watch anymore!
GO TO YOUR ROOM!!!!
By early afternoon I was on holiday overload. The kids were too loud, the house was a mess, and I thought there was a thunderstorm with all the jumping around that was going on above me. Plus, everyone was bickering with each other for one reason or another until I had finally had enough. "Just go to your room for awhile and be good!" After a half an hour, I found the kids playing really nice together. "Ahhhh, peace and quiet. A little bit of heaven here on earth. "
Christmas Photos
This is a picture of all the girls. Rachel, Anna, Sveta, Julia, Annalyn, my sister Elena, my mom, my other mom (MIL), and myself.
Jonny loves this Nerf Gun. It shoots four bullets at one time! Andrew got one two. Too bad that last night Andrew pulled off all the wings and essentially broke the bullets. Anyone else have a semi-destructive five year old?
Let's give it up for Miss Anna Montana!
William and Caleb playing mega Tether ball.
My mom made this spread of wonderful goodies. I learned last night that her extra chewy chocolate chip cookies taste really good with a dollop of her chocolate pudding pie on top. Her baklava, and banana bread isn't to bad either. Yummy!
Monday, December 24, 2007
Christmas Eve
After we had waffles for breakfast, Andrew and Jonny decided they were still hungry.
Nothing like sharing a bowl of cereal to bring two brothers closer together.
Rachel gave me this as an early Christmas present.
Just when I think it couldn't get any better, John showed me his early Christmas present to me. He shaved!
Here are our Three Musketeers acting goofy at Grandma and Grandpa's house before opening presents.
Nothing like live music to liven up a room.
See! Here is Annalyn doing a little dance. You go girl!
Watching who knows what.
Probably sports or something.
Anna and Jonny were so cute together tonight.
Opening presents that we exchange with Grandma and Grandpa.
Yes, I got roller blades. Wooo-hoo! Now I can go to the skate park.
Anna got a Hannah Montana Barbie.
Rachel didn't even waste the box that Anna's barbie came in.
How resourceful is that? Now she has things to hang up on her wall in her room.
Sveta loves her dog Zsa Zsa. Remind me to share a story about Zsa Zsa later.
This is what we gave Mom and Dad.
The kids are playing with good ol' Tinker Toys.
The kids enjoying their gifts from Grandma and Grandpa.
Sveta with her Daddy. She adores him you know.
Hope all of you have a blessed Christmas as you celebrate the birth of our Savior Jesus Christ!
Merry Christmas everyone!
Nothing like sharing a bowl of cereal to bring two brothers closer together.
Rachel gave me this as an early Christmas present.
Just when I think it couldn't get any better, John showed me his early Christmas present to me. He shaved!
Here are our Three Musketeers acting goofy at Grandma and Grandpa's house before opening presents.
Nothing like live music to liven up a room.
See! Here is Annalyn doing a little dance. You go girl!
Watching who knows what.
Probably sports or something.
Anna and Jonny were so cute together tonight.
Opening presents that we exchange with Grandma and Grandpa.
Yes, I got roller blades. Wooo-hoo! Now I can go to the skate park.
Anna got a Hannah Montana Barbie.
Rachel didn't even waste the box that Anna's barbie came in.
How resourceful is that? Now she has things to hang up on her wall in her room.
Sveta loves her dog Zsa Zsa. Remind me to share a story about Zsa Zsa later.
This is what we gave Mom and Dad.
The kids are playing with good ol' Tinker Toys.
The kids enjoying their gifts from Grandma and Grandpa.
Sveta with her Daddy. She adores him you know.
Hope all of you have a blessed Christmas as you celebrate the birth of our Savior Jesus Christ!
Merry Christmas everyone!
Sunday, December 23, 2007
The joy of giving
Reluctantly, I took Caleb, and all the girls shopping at Dollartree. They really wanted to do some Christmas shopping for each other, and for John and I. I was torn between letting them buy more junk that I know they didn't need, and allowing them to buy gifts for someone else so that they could experience the act of giving. After much begging, I gave in and took them shopping.
I had them make a list before they went so that they knew exactly what they wanted to buy, and I made sure that they knew that this wasn't a shopping trip to buy things for themselves. They all agreed.
I pretty much gave them free reign in the store, but I called out to them periodically to see how their shopping was coming along. As everyone was paying for their items, I couldn't help but notice that Sveta had a big bag of cotton balls. Innocently, I started to pull them out of her basket. I thought that they were there by mistake, but I was quickly corrected.
"Mom. I buy those for you. Close your eyes. I don't want you to see."
I was speechless, and just let her buy them. I really wish she hadn't because I didn't need cotton balls but I didn't want to take away her joy.
The car ride home was well worth the hassle of taking them all out. They expressed such excitement about the gifts that they had bought for each other, that it made me cry with happiness.
Well not cry, but you know....shed a tear or two.
They spent the next morning, wrapping the presents they got for each other.
As Julia was finishing up with her gift wrapping she said to me, "Mom, I feel really good right now. It feels so nice to be giving these presents."
Anna graciously helped Sveta wrap her gifts.
Later in the day, Sveta brought me the wrapped bag of cotton balls, and asked me if I had bought her a nice jacket. I told her no, and how that present was the one that she had wrapped for me. She started to argue with me because she was convinced that the present was for her. "It has my name on it Mama. And feel it. It is soft like a jacket. I know you buy it for me." She saw both of our names on the package and thought it was for her from me. Anna quickly whispered into her ear, and Sveta instantly turned red. It was one of those moments where I think Sveta realized that her brain wasn't working the way she wanted it too. She quickly corrected herself and put the present back under the tree. She seemed truly disappointed, and I felt really bad for her.
Folks, this isn't an act. This is Sveta's reality. It may seem minor now.......... because no harm was done, but it is happening more and more often where she has these brain glitches. I'm not sure how to handle them, because she can get really defensive once she realizes what she just did. This, mixed with her learning delays and impulsive behavior makes it hard to judge exactly what she is and what she is not ready to do. On one hand, I want to hold her back from doing the things that her same aged siblings are doing because she is not mature or responsible enough, but on the other hand, I want to allow her some freedom to do age-appropriate things so that she feels like she is not being allowed to grow up. The fact is..... she is growing up whether we like it or not.
For any new readers, in case you don't know, Sveta has FAS (fetal alcohol syndrome).
But that doesn't stop her from having a very giving heart. I will find a way to use those cotton balls if it is the last thing I do.
I had them make a list before they went so that they knew exactly what they wanted to buy, and I made sure that they knew that this wasn't a shopping trip to buy things for themselves. They all agreed.
I pretty much gave them free reign in the store, but I called out to them periodically to see how their shopping was coming along. As everyone was paying for their items, I couldn't help but notice that Sveta had a big bag of cotton balls. Innocently, I started to pull them out of her basket. I thought that they were there by mistake, but I was quickly corrected.
"Mom. I buy those for you. Close your eyes. I don't want you to see."
I was speechless, and just let her buy them. I really wish she hadn't because I didn't need cotton balls but I didn't want to take away her joy.
The car ride home was well worth the hassle of taking them all out. They expressed such excitement about the gifts that they had bought for each other, that it made me cry with happiness.
Well not cry, but you know....shed a tear or two.
They spent the next morning, wrapping the presents they got for each other.
As Julia was finishing up with her gift wrapping she said to me, "Mom, I feel really good right now. It feels so nice to be giving these presents."
Anna graciously helped Sveta wrap her gifts.
Later in the day, Sveta brought me the wrapped bag of cotton balls, and asked me if I had bought her a nice jacket. I told her no, and how that present was the one that she had wrapped for me. She started to argue with me because she was convinced that the present was for her. "It has my name on it Mama. And feel it. It is soft like a jacket. I know you buy it for me." She saw both of our names on the package and thought it was for her from me. Anna quickly whispered into her ear, and Sveta instantly turned red. It was one of those moments where I think Sveta realized that her brain wasn't working the way she wanted it too. She quickly corrected herself and put the present back under the tree. She seemed truly disappointed, and I felt really bad for her.
Folks, this isn't an act. This is Sveta's reality. It may seem minor now.......... because no harm was done, but it is happening more and more often where she has these brain glitches. I'm not sure how to handle them, because she can get really defensive once she realizes what she just did. This, mixed with her learning delays and impulsive behavior makes it hard to judge exactly what she is and what she is not ready to do. On one hand, I want to hold her back from doing the things that her same aged siblings are doing because she is not mature or responsible enough, but on the other hand, I want to allow her some freedom to do age-appropriate things so that she feels like she is not being allowed to grow up. The fact is..... she is growing up whether we like it or not.
For any new readers, in case you don't know, Sveta has FAS (fetal alcohol syndrome).
But that doesn't stop her from having a very giving heart. I will find a way to use those cotton balls if it is the last thing I do.
What were they thinking?
Adam started this goofy thing with stamping his tummy.
Jonny wanted to do it too.
He thought his face needed some Christmas spirit too.
Sveta soon joined in.
Last but not least, Anna did it too.
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